As a pastor I have a responsibility to help the congregation I serve to think biblically about the Supreme Court’s recent decisions related to same-sex marriage. Some are wondering how this decision will affect our church, our witness, and our future. I am neither a politician, nor a lawyer, nor a prophet. I am simply a Christian who rests in the truth that God knows the end from the beginning. But as I have had the opportunity to reflect on what has happened, these ten points have been at the forefront of my thinking. I pray that they are of some use to you.
For some helpful resources that go into greater depth than my brief points, look at:
- "Love and the Inhumanity of Same Sex Marriage" by Jonathan Leeman
- "'Waiting for the Other Shoe' -- The Supreme Court Rules on Same Sex Marriage," by Al Mohler
- "9 Things You Should Know About the Supreme Court's Same Sex Marriage Cases," by Joe Carter
- "Why Gay Marriage is Good (and Bad) For the Church," by Trevin Wax
- What is Marriage? Man and Woman: A Defense, edited by Sherif Girgis, Ryan T. Anderson, and Robert George
Ten Points About Same-Sex Marriage
1. Last week the United States Supreme Court ruled that it is unconstitutional to deny federal benefits to same-sex couples who married in states where same-sex marriage is legal. The Supreme Court also paved the way for California to become the 14th state to legalize same-sex marriage, over and against the will of California’s voters.
2. It is important to understand that we are not discussing whether same-sex couples may get married. They have done that for years in ceremonies held in so-called faith communities that had no qualms with same-sex marriage. It has not, at least in recent history, been criminal in America for a same-sex couple to consider themselves married. At issue is whether the federal government will revise its definition of marriage beyond what some are calling “conjugal marriage”—the marriage of one man to one woman.
3. But the Supreme Court decided that it is the duty of the federal government to promote same-sex marriage. Regardless of our understanding of the relationship between the church and the state, Christians are not allowed to promote sinful behavior. Thus we are called to observe the decision made by the Supreme Court and say, “That is wrong.”
4. Those of us who struggle with the question, “But why is it wrong?” should keep two important points in mind. First, an individual may feel emotionally drawn toward and physically attracted to an individual of the same-sex, but that internal feeling does not make acting out appropriate, any more than it is appropriate for a married man to act on his feelings for another man’s wife. Second, not only did God design marriage as an institution between a man and a woman, but we understand that marriage is a picture of the gospel. We are called to preserve the conjugal marriage definition because we are to called to preserve the gospel.
5. We will, of course, be tempted to discouragement at the thought of living in a nation that appears to have lost its moral compass. But let this discouragement drive you to be more prayerful for our country and our church. Pray that our leaders will leave room for our views on marriage. But even more importantly, pray that you will take comfort in a God who has saved you more than you take comfort in a nation that agrees with you.
6. It is important to realize that the national attitude regarding same-sex marriage did not happen overnight. A people that tolerate abortion, pornography, and no-fault divorce would inevitably tolerate same-sex marriage. As we see in God raising Saul as the first king of Israel, sometimes God gives people the leaders they deserve.
7. It is just as important to realize that the church bears some responsibility, but not the way you might think. We do not bear responsibility primarily because we failed to get out the vote, but because we failed to purify the church. In other words, too often our churches looked so much like the world in our attitude to or at least our practice of sexuality and marriage that we have no right to be surprised the entire culture is adrift. We have too often turned a blind eye to members in our churches who failed to take their own covenant commitment in marriage seriously. Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians 5:12 are telling, “For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge?”
8. But even if we did everything right (which we have not) we still should not be surprised to find ourselves holding an opinion about marriage disdained by so many Americans around us. Peter described Christians as “sojourners and exiles” in 1 Peter 2:11. He did this to remind them that this world is not our home. Our neighbors think and live differently because Christ is not their Lord. Moreover, Peter predicted in the next verse that our neighbors will speak against us as evildoers. We need to be ready to be thought of as “evildoers” due to our support for the conjugal definition of marriage.
9. The Supreme Court’s decision presents us with a fresh opportunity to model the gospel in a dark world. We should expect to stand out as distinct, even holy, because of our views on and practice of marriage. Now is the time to be celibate in singleness and sexually pure in marriage. Now is the time to be content if you don’t have a spouse and faithful if you do. Our views on chastity will increasingly lead to difficult but important evangelistic conversation.
10. Finally, please take heart. The mission of the church has not changed. We are still here to know each other, equip each other, and send each other out to share the gospel for the worship and glory of God. Our success is not dependent upon anyone agreeing with us but our own faithfulness to stand fast even when he or she does not. Moreover, in the end, God wins. So, as Jesus taught in Matthew 5:16, let our “light shine before others, so that they may see [our] good works and give glory to [our] Father who is in heaven.”
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