I once had a friend who was paid to go to the movie theater. Seriously! She bought a ticket, ordered snacks, and sat down for a screening of her favorite show—all on someone else’s nickel. How do you get a job like this? As it turns out, the theater hired people to rate a local cinema’s performance: Were the ticket agents friendly? Was the popcorn fresh? Did people’s shoes stick to the floor? She collected all this data and wrote it up into a report that could be used to help improve the viewer’s experience.
Did you know that some churches do the same thing? I just received a flyer in my box from a company that offers to hire “numerous, local, ‘unchurched’ people” to visit my church. They’ll attend anonymously, complete a survey, and then report on what I can do to make guests feel more welcome. The company even promises that after I implement their suggested changes, visitors will be “more likely to feel accepted, return, or even call the church ‘home.’” Maybe.
It seems unwise to hire people to attend church. I appreciate leaders trying to pull down every stumbling block that might keep someone from attending or “sticking” at a church. But at the end of the day, we ought to be as faithful as we can be to the ministry of the Word and prayer, and leave the rest to God.
But what does faithfulness to visitors look like? Certainly companies like the one I mentioned above exist for a reason. Churches can become lackadaisical, even lazy about welcoming newcomers. I don’t want to Mount Vernon to be apathetic. With that in mind, let me encourage you to give some careful attention to your approach to church visitors.
By the way, what I’m about to say about visitors could apply to new members as well. If you have been a member of the church for a long time, consider ways you can fold some of the newer members into your life, too. Remember Paul’s words to the Thessalonians, “So, being affectionately desirous of you, we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves, because you had become very dear to us” (1 Thess 2:8). So, just as Paul shared his life with others, so should we.
But let’s think for a moment, especially, about how you should reach out to visitors:
1. Know who the visitors are. I’ve noticed over the years that some people are hesitant to welcome visitors for fear they actually welcome a member. The conversation goes something like this:
“So, how long have you been coming?”
“About five years. We joined four years ago.”
“Really? Oh, I’m so sorry we haven’t met.”
“Actually, we did meet. Don’t you remember, at the picnic?”
“Oh, that’s right . . .”
So to spare ourselves from conversations like this, some of us simply avoid talking to new people altogether. That’s not helpful. By all means, make sure you have a church directory and pray through it regularly. There are pictures next to each name, and that way you’ll know who the members are. But even if you make a mistake and greet someone who’s already a member, it’s not the end of the world. And it may be the beginning of a wonderful, new friendship.
2. Be thankful there are visitors. Our disposition toward the fact that we even have newcomers should be one of gratitude to God. He is sovereign in all things. “For every beast of the forest is mine, the cattle on a thousand hills, and all that moves in the field is mine” (Psa 50:10). This God is at work in our daily affairs and when, in God’s providence, visitors come to our church, this is no accident. They are there, even for that one Sunday, for a reason. So let’s be thankful.
3. Give them a warm welcome. Christians are to kindly greet one another. “Greet one another with a holy kiss,” Paul wrote (Rom 16:16). American customs don’t allow for this kind of kissing anymore, but the point still stands. There ought to be a sincere warmth and appreciation for visitors—even those believers who may be passing through our town for a short while. They are brothers or sisters in Christ and the gospel compels us to receive them warmly.
4. Be thoughtful that not all visitors are Christians. I attended a church for over a year before the Lord saved me. I went there first for the sake of a friend, but eventually because I wanted to hear the gospel. I didn’t have a sign over my head telling people that I wasn’t a Christian. But if anyone engaged me in serious conversation, it wouldn’t have taken them long to find out. We should be sensitive to the fact that non-Christians do come to our gatherings. It’s one of the reasons why, when I preach, I often try to address unbelievers. I want them to know that they are welcome and that this is a safe place to explore the Christian faith.
5. Engage visitors in conversation. In our culture, one of the ways we warmly welcome is by engaging others in conversation. Simple questions like, “Where are you from?” “How did you hear about the church?” “What did you appreciate about the service?” can go a long way to making someone feel like you care about them, who they are, and what they think. Of course, this may mean not engaging a good friend in conversation—at least not at the service. But that’s okay. You’ll have other opportunities to talk to your friend. God has brought this new person into your life for a reason—so take a moment to engage him or her.
6. Invite visitors to share a meal. Isn’t it amazing that God designed us to need food? He could have made us like plants who get energy simply from sitting in the sun. Instead, he requires us to eat. And we can’t just stick a whole potato in our mouth. We have to cook it to make it soft and use a fork and knife to cut it up into bits that will fit. All of this takes time. It’s as if God is saying, “You need to eat, slow down.” Take advantage of the time needed to eat by welcoming visitors into your life over a meal. And who knows who you are having over! “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares” (Heb 13:2).
7. Appreciate how hard it can be to find a church. If you’ve been a member of a church for years, you may have forgotten how nerve-racking it can be to meet new people. For someone moving from out of town, or across town, getting plugged into a brand new place presents a host of challenges. Will you be accepted? Will you make friends? Will your absence be noticed? Simply being mindful that some visitors are struggling with questions like this may motivate you to serve by welcoming well.
Much more could be said, but above all, be thoughtful about the people God brings into your life at our weekly gatherings. Part of serving the Lord is loving the flock—even those folks who are wondering if they should be part of this flock, too.